Poker love

 
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We're all just out here trading pieces of love. Everyone has a pile of chips. We can trade or we can give away. When we give away, it shows we have faith that we’ll get some back somewhere along the line. We hope someone is feeling generous. We’re all trying to make good trades. We all want to be left with something to hold onto.

It’s a wonderful feeling to be given with no condition that you must give back – but if you’re kind enough, you want to. Or if you're me, you want to dump the whole bunch of chips into someone’s arms. TAKE THEM ALL TAKE ALL THE LOVE, you need it you need it – not thinking for a second what that means for you.

Some people have the hardest time giving any away. Some people aren’t the gambling type. Others have a hard time accepting any chips at all. Some are tapping the table repeatedly, hit me. Hit me again. Be careful, I think. You’ll bust open with all that love.

I’m the unabomber with cheap sunglasses on. I am the identity you all told me I wasn’t, but I’m mistaken to think this world can’t read me. I’m not as intimidating as I think I look. I wear my love like a shirt on inside out. And if you’re cold, I’ll give you that too.

Everyone I’ve ever loved got up from the table. Now it’s just me and the dealer. She’s looking at the few chips I have left in front of me. Nothing about me is by the book. “All in” I say without hesitation.

Sometimes you bet on the wrong people. Sometimes you lose and you have to leave the table.

Sometimes you’re walking down the street and a stranger hands you a chip to keep you in the game. Just when you thought it was over, you’ve made it one more day. And you’re glad you have.

There are other tables. You can sit down at a new one and look up and see someone you thought you lost. Sometimes I imagine seeing you.

Then there are times when you think you’re bluffing, you think you’ve got nothing. And you take another look at your cards – just before you get up. And you realize you don’t care what they say. You only care about the person sitting across from you. And you’ve got all the love you need right here. You’re not bluffing anymore. And you realize you’ve won.